Pixoto- A Must for Photographers of Every Level!

I wouldn’t call myself a “Professional” Photographer.  I do well enough to have a few people pay me for the service.  (Which, technically, is the definition)

I have found a website called “Pixoto” that allows you to post your photos and have other professionals rate them in “Duals” (your photo against another in a similar category).  Every time you vote, you get a credit.  You use the credits to post and give “boosts” (more duals) to the images you feel deserve more of a shot.  As a brass ring for you to reach for, they have Daily, Weekly, Monthly and Yearly awards that may be had as Best, Top 5, Top 10, Top 5%, Top 10% and Top 20%.

You don’t even need a high end camera to “compete” on this site.  A photo I took of my Daughter with my phone just won a yearly award for the “mobile” category!

If you’re a pro, this is a great way to be noticed.  They even have a marketplace option that you can sell your images through them.  If you’re not a pro, it’s fun to see where your stuff rates against “the masters”.  For everybody, it’s a wonderful place to get inspired for your next shoot!

Http://www.pixoto.com

It’s free, it’s fun, it’s valuable!

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The History of Not Thinking Things Through

When humans first roamed the Earth, we were outside, in the elements. We decided that being out in the rain sucked so we moved into caves.

Once in the caves (or other enclosures), we decided it sucked we can’t see outside anymore. So we put a hole in the wall so we can take in the scenery.

Soon, that hole was a problem because others were able to see in our enclosures and robbing us of our privacy. So we put up curtains.

So as you can see, the process of not thinking things through is an instinct handed down from our great, great, great ancestors and you cannot avoid doing, or at least being victim to, the dance.

Sex as a Weapon

To lead off, enjoy (if you can) this wonderful video from the 80’s!

Now on to the news.  In the last few weeks, we have had some disturbing encounters in the bedroom.  First, A Washington State man DIED from suffocation due to a woman’s breasts (reports are she laid on his face and refused to get up).  There was a second case of this back in November over in Germany.  What the heck is going on?

That story only takes SECOND PLACE in the WTH meter!  Get a load of THIS one!

At the intersection of “extremely sexy” and “extremely sick,” we crash into this. A Brazilian woman has been accused of coating her ladyparts in poison, then trying to murder her husband by seducing him into performing oral sex on her. Her bid failed because he noticed a “strange smell” down there and took her (as any caring husband would) to a local hospital to investigate further. Doctors detected the poison, and the ruse was uncovered — after, we imagine, many, many rounds of “How’d that get there?!” The husband is now suing his probably soon-to-be-former wife.

Do you think that’s what Robert Duvall meant when he said “I love the smell of Napalm in the morning!”  What are you girls learning from Doctor Oz, Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice?

I thought the days of sexual sabotage died when the Vietnam war ended.  For those who don’t know, the little Vietnam hotties would lure our soldiers into a sexual romp, only to find out that they had razor blades stuffed up their “Va-Jay-Jay” leaving G. I. Joe looking like a microwaved Oscar Meyer!

I hope this is not the beginning of a new trend for you ladies.  I have always regarded women as “the better sex”

I would hate to think that we would have to call our buddies just before intercourse and be like:

“Okay, dude.  I’m going in.  If I don’t call back in 5 minutes, call the cops!”

“DUDE!  Five minutes?  Okay, Quick Draw!  (Laughter)”

 

Five Key Steps to a Successful Relationship with your Daughter

  • Always be involved in her life.

As I stated in a previous blog. I am getting high praise for spending time with my girls when I think it’s the least I can do for them! “Take time to be a Father” Is that really too much to ask?

  • Respect and honor her Mother.

Again, an old-fashioned rule that is lost today. My Wife and I do our best to keep our personal issues personal and away from the kids. They don’t need to hear it, about it, or have either of us badmouth each other to the kids.

  • Treasure every moment with her.

This one doesn’t set in until its too late for most. Oh yeah, it SUCKS being woken up a 2am by the sound of your child crying but one day they aren’t going to need you at all and what you wouldn’t give to have one more night of it. For those who’ve been there, you know. For those who aren’t parents yet or going through it now, you think I’m NUTS!

  • Pray for her every day.

I’m not trying to start a holy war with this statement. But you and I both know you’ve asked a being of a higher power to look over your child. It’s all we’re allowed to do since encasing them in bubble wrap is frowned upon in this society.

  • Be her hero!

I always looked up to my parents. I doubt that will ever change and I hope my kids will always look up to my Wife and I. Neither of us are stay at home parents (not our dream, I can tell you that) and we do what we can to give them the experiences they could ever dream of. (And if they keep going along with my being “Batman”, that would be cool, too!)

Politics- Time for the Party to End

Once again, Facebook sparks the soapbox to come out!

Are we as a nation THAT polarized that we think THIS is the best response to Obama’s reelection?  Remember, I labeled BOTH candidates as Batman villains!

THERE WAS NO REAL CHOICE!

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Both Liberals and Conservatives, left and right, Republicans and Democrats are destroying this country!  Only when we, AS A NATION, can stop drawing lines and allowing a select few to run the show in this country will the American Dream revitalize itself and rise like the Phoenix out of the ashes.

Until then, thank you for destroying the country during my life and forever burying it for my children.

All for the sake of YOUR pocketbooks.

Assholes.

In the meantime, don’t desecrate the one symbol of hope this country has left of reclaiming itself for your own, childish, dim-witted, ideals!

I’m Batman

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Batman has always been my favorite superhero. Despite, being raised on the Adam West show, I have always been drawn to the fact that it was just a regular guy, striking revenge on the criminal world to avenge the death of his patents. He could be any of us (provide we inherited a ton of money and ran off to Asia to train for 8 years!)

When my sister and I went outside to play Batman, she played Robin, which was very convenient since that’s her name! (See, my parents even knew to name her that… Because they knew who I am! Lol)

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I had Batman birthday cakes, Halloween costumes, action figures, playsets, puzzles, I renamed my Green Machine (a cooler version of the old Big Wheels) the Bat-mobile, our basement was the Bat-cave, and all the comics, coloring books, graphic novels, and books over the years.

When Michael Keaton’s Batman came out, I was there opening night. (In fact, I’ve seen all the Batman movies in the theatre). I even just got done checking up on the Dark Knight’s appearance on the Superman movie coming up this year, the Justice League movie (2015) and his own reboot movie (slated for 2017- TOO FAR)

Now that I have kids (yes, they love superheroes, too!), they are getting an earful of conversations ending “Do you know why?”
“Why Daddy?”
“BECAUSE I’M BATMAN!”

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In fact, on my oldest’s birthday last year, she informed me that I was no longer magical (making a coin disappear by hiding it under my leg was no longer mesmerizing to her). Needless to say, I was hurt by the passing of that time of her life and coming to grips with she won’t stay lite forever. So I asked, as a last ditch effort to keep my little girl, “But I’m still Batman, right?”
And she responded immediately “Well, yeah! Duh!” That’s all the vindication I need!

I think we can wrap this up with the following pic I found on the Internet:

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Of course, there is one person that trumps Batman….

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But that’s another story…

 

 

Father of the Year? Really?

I’m tired of being considered a hero or an extraordinary just because I have actually played Dad to my children.  I don’t understand where feeding them, changing their diapers or (god forbid) spending time with them warrants any praise.

Have we, as a nation, given up on criticizing the slackers and just praising those who are just doing their “job”?

Has the Father role model decayed to the point where just being in the house is considered good enough?

When my Wife wants to head out for a “girls night”, I am NOT “babysitting”.  I am their Father, I’ve GOT the kids that night.

What the hell is wrong with all these other sperm donors that they can’t step up and do their part of raising these kids?  Your job didn’t end at the end of that drunken night, jackhole!  I realize that you weren’t planning on having a child out of this romp in the sack, but you did.  It’s YOUR responsibility.  Own up to it!

Take time to be a Dad today.  You know I’m going to!