Sex as a Weapon

To lead off, enjoy (if you can) this wonderful video from the 80’s!

Now on to the news.  In the last few weeks, we have had some disturbing encounters in the bedroom.  First, A Washington State man DIED from suffocation due to a woman’s breasts (reports are she laid on his face and refused to get up).  There was a second case of this back in November over in Germany.  What the heck is going on?

That story only takes SECOND PLACE in the WTH meter!  Get a load of THIS one!

At the intersection of “extremely sexy” and “extremely sick,” we crash into this. A Brazilian woman has been accused of coating her ladyparts in poison, then trying to murder her husband by seducing him into performing oral sex on her. Her bid failed because he noticed a “strange smell” down there and took her (as any caring husband would) to a local hospital to investigate further. Doctors detected the poison, and the ruse was uncovered — after, we imagine, many, many rounds of “How’d that get there?!” The husband is now suing his probably soon-to-be-former wife.

Do you think that’s what Robert Duvall meant when he said “I love the smell of Napalm in the morning!”  What are you girls learning from Doctor Oz, Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice?

I thought the days of sexual sabotage died when the Vietnam war ended.  For those who don’t know, the little Vietnam hotties would lure our soldiers into a sexual romp, only to find out that they had razor blades stuffed up their “Va-Jay-Jay” leaving G. I. Joe looking like a microwaved Oscar Meyer!

I hope this is not the beginning of a new trend for you ladies.  I have always regarded women as “the better sex”

I would hate to think that we would have to call our buddies just before intercourse and be like:

“Okay, dude.  I’m going in.  If I don’t call back in 5 minutes, call the cops!”

“DUDE!  Five minutes?  Okay, Quick Draw!  (Laughter)”

 

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